[Disclaimer: I'll say this now, I'm not really as stressed as my blog entries make it look. In fact, I am having quite a lot of fun. Sometimes though, things don't go perfectly - which is when I wander to my blog to post and get rid of the minor stress caused by these so I can go back to having fun.]

Darling roommates:

I know washing dishes is hard. Really, I know. I feel for you. Must be especially difficult washing that pan you burned eggs in. (I could smell them burning in my sleep.) But please, don't just leave them soaking in a sinkful of soapy water. Some of us (*waves*) would like to, you know, be able to use that kitchen sink. To be able to get water to cook pasta for lunch, for instance. Yes, yes, I know, you were in a hurry to leave in the morning, and you didn't really expect somebody to stay up until 4am at night fixing computer stuff (*waves*) - my bad for sleeping in then wanting to have lunch at the apartment before going to work. My fault, I guess. But please. Plan ahead and wash the dishes?

Also: I have no idea what that yellowish stuff on the stove was. Egg, I'm assuming. All I know is it wasn't there the night before, when I got milk out of the fridge as belated dinner. So please, if something you're cooking happens to fall on the stove, clean it. Don't just leave it there. That's gross.

Additionally: I have no idea which of you left the (used, I'm assuming) razor blade on the sink in the bathroom, but it's been there for two days now. I'm seriously tempted to throw it away if I find it still there when I get home. Ew.

While on the subject of the sink in the bathroom? If you wash your hands, and the water runs grey with the dirt, do be nice and clean the sink afterwards.

Esteemed random female apartment dweller:
I have no clue who you are, but really. I know we're packed tightly in the apartment, but the clothes line is not an extension of your wardrobe. Your shirt has been there for three days, I see it every time I go to the kitchen. Might want to put it back in your room, before it accidentally gets dropped on the floor and left there when I next do laundry.

Dear new roommate:
I am terribly sorry I woke you last night when I got back at 3am from work, but really. Of all the ways you could've placed your mattress in the room, you went and picked "diagonally across the room". Which meant that the door wouldn't open fully, because your mattress was in the way; that I made an awful racket getting my toiletry stuff, because your mattress was wedged quite firmly against the ground-level shelf I'd put it on; that I tripped on your mattress at least three times, because it was in the way between me and my bed. You're brilliant. Really. Do stop glaring at me, it was your own damn fault.

Dear Email Guy:
Yes, yes, I know, you want to check your email. No, you may not in fact do that on the computers I am currently testing. Yes, I know the monitor is labelled "Staff computer", but I'm using it to test stuff. Please, do refrain from staring incredulously at me when I state that fact, and when I repeat my answer. Also, why yes, I'm female and I know computers. Do stop grinning lecherously at me, that won't change my answer. Have a nice day, without your email.

Dear office dwellers:
I'm carrying monitors. I'm carrying computers. They're heavy. Get out of my goddamn way before I decide to drop one on your foot. Thank you so much.